One of the ways we can get stuck is to deny ourselves the
time and space to engage in this remembering.
We think or are told that there
is no point in it; you can’t go back, no one can make the past different
so just move on…but it is important. Spending
time remembering our loved one is essential to making progress in our grief
journey and in healing our broken hearts.
Why is this so important when it
causes so much pain? Because it is
the way that we gradually shift our emotional attachment from the physical,
bodily person who is separated from us to our memories of the person. And
those memories cannot be taken from us. Take a few minutes this week to look at
pictures (or listen to songs or visit places) of your loved one(s), and try to
remember the stories around those pictures – even if they bring you to
tears. If possible, tell someone that
you trust these precious memories. In
the bittersweet-ness of those moments, you will begin to get little pieces of
your own broken heart back.
... for you to find continuing hope and encouragement during the ups and downs of your grief journey.
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
Workshop 2013 Spring Week 3: How Not to Get Stuck in Our Grief
How do you react to pain, particularly emotional pain? Human beings are, for the most part, hard-wired
to avoid it. When we are hit with the
storms of grief, the most natural thing in the world is for us to try to avoid
feeling it and thinking about what is causing us pain. It takes tremendous courage to mourn our
loss(es), because it requires us to think about and feel the very things we
want to avoid thinking about and feeling.
What triggers your feelings of grief?
A song? Certain places with
particular memories? Pictures of your
loved one or loved ones?
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